Grandparents /Grandchildren.
(The way forward)
Gloria Hunniford is an excellent celebrity to highlight the need for grandparents to be more prominent in their grandchildren’s lives. I have written to her myself a few months ago because of the similarity of losing both our daughters to breast cancer in early motherhood. It was heartbreaking to lose our own daughter but to find out that we could be cut off from her children, especially when they had bonded with us from birth, caused the children and us so much grief and distress it was unbearable.
The UK Government is being requested to remove the need for grandparents to crave a courts permission to apply for contact with their grandchildren. In Scotland we already have the right to go straight to court without asking permission but it has not advanced the cause any further. The problem of being irrelevant persons in the eyes of Social Services and professionals and to convince a court that grandparents are decent enough to have contact with their own flesh and blood. “This being an insult to the extreme”.
We need to be more focussed and specific about what is required.’ The Charter for Grandchildren’ having been thought out carefully by the legal eagles of a government and created by the Scottish Executive needs to be adopted and made compulsory for professionals such as Social Services to accept that grandparents are of huge importance in children’s lives.
The UK Governments are determined that grandparents will never get automatic legal rights to their grandchildren; they claim it would cause more problems than it would resolve. In the stakeholders group that created the ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ we experienced hostility from father’s groups who claimed that grandparents would have more rights than some parents, and if that came about it would cause enormous conflict on a massive scale. We have no desire to take over our grandchildren; we only wish to know them, love them and be part of the family. We consider parents to be the first and foremost in their children’s lives every time, with grandparents a close second.
‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ was to be advisory guidelines for everyone who work in the welfare of children to consider more carefully the role grandparents can play in their grandchildren’s lives, especially in the absence of one or both parents. There is an urgent need to have this as legal protection for children because of the failings of the professionals dealing with their welfare and to ensure children have the best and fairest treatment by Social Services or professionals that is humanly possible.
We have a petition on line to make 'The Charter for Grandchildren' Mandatory for professionals working in the welfare and protection of children to ensure children have the best care and protection available.
Please sign? http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/TCFGRA/ Hard copies are also available for signatures.
For all the Governments of the UK to adopt and make the ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ mandatory for all professionals to be answerable in law for not working “In the Child’s best interest” especially in today’s society where it is everyday headlines in the media about their failing our children.
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ
0141 882 5658
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk
Thursday, May 28, 2009
'The Charter for Fathers'
‘The Charter for Fathers’
(Dealing with Conflict, protecting children)
Separation and divorce can be a nasty and bitter experience for every one concerned especially the children. It appears to be that 90% are fathers that lose out but it can happen to mothers too.. You would not believe your new loving sweetheart, presently telling you that “I will always be yours”, could be anything else but loving and gentle.
In our experience in dealing with grandparents that are prevented from contact with their grandchildren is that there is at least one parent involved too. We have come to the conclusion that both are inseparable and in the end it is the children we feel for in the conflict of hatred, spite and revenge that ruins their lives.
We just hope you will not experience any of these horrors but! Some of you certainly will.
Too often we have heard “I just can’t believe it, that she/he could go to these extremes like telling lies about domestic violence and using the children for revenge and blackmail to get back at me for their own selfish means”.
If you are experiencing marital problems or thinking of separating get in touch with a family group for advice. Do not delay and do not try to work it out yourself or force your will on anyone. Contact any of us listed on the contacts list before you do anything, and we mean anything. If we can’t help we will know a man that can.
1. Urgent! Firstly contact an outside family agency, someone not involved with the family and keep contact throughout. You must resolve the situation without any aggression or incidents or you will lose. If you don’t heed this you will possibly lose your children as well.
2. Speak to someone in a help group before contacting anyone you are in conflict with.. You will be too emotional to handle this on your own.
3. Do not swear or raise your voice or obstruct in any way. if you do come in contact with your ex-partner or their family.
4. If the police become involved move away as directed immediately. The police have no stomach for family problems. Do not argue or try to reason as you will get removed and possibly charged with breach or harassment and it will never be removed from your record, even if you are innocent. It could be used against you if courts or Social Services get involved. Don’t give any excuse or you will be indefensible and not even we can help. You have been warned!
5. You will have to fight for any rights you do have regarding your children. It is equal on paper but don’t be fooled by this, in reality if you don’t live with your children, in the eyes of Social services, schools and the police you have no rights at all. Always have witnesses to everything you do and record everything in a diary.
6. If you need a solicitor make sure they are family law specialists as others could possibly take your case and lack the expertise. Be prepared to do most of the case work yourself, they are your children, make sure you get things right, you will only get one chance.
7. Mediation has resolved many disputes before a molehill becomes a mountain, before it goes into the real slanging match with accusing and condemning in court. You don’t want to be the cause of them saying, “you are angry and aggressive so I won’t attend mediation”. Give no excuses to refuse to attend. Make sure that the mediation is provided by an independent organisation like Family Mediation. They ask for donations only. You will find them in your local phone book or computer.
8. There also appears to be a standard template used by the parent with residency so do not be alarmed to find yourself falsely accused and branded as:-
a) Violent b)Controlling c)Abusive d)Aggressive c) Sexually abuse.
All of these will be used to alienate you from your children.
9. Above all try and gain agreement through mediation without involvement of lawyers, courts, police or Social Services. If you gain a court order for contact it is not always complied with and is often not enforced making a mockery of our family laws. Your children have nothing to gain by these agencies involvement and very real significant harm can come of it.
10. Seek help as soon you can from a help group and keep in touch with at least one of their members or/and their meetings.
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Jimmy - 0141 882 5658 - UK
Jim - 01389 874 095- Clydebank and the west
Charlie - 01324 410 064- Larbet
Bill - 01563 821 869- Ayrshire
Richard - 01224 297 175- Aberdeen & the north
Eamonn - 0141 580 0102- Barrhead & the west
Frank- 01492 874 395- Wales
Elton - 01253 341 659- Blackpool area.
The Ten Commandments of Family Law.
(What we feel needs to change for our children’s best interest?)
1…Our motto is “Bringing Families Together” so we think the best interests of a
child starts with Equal parenting when there is no factually proven reason not
to.
2....The ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ to be Mandatory for Professionals working in
Children’s welfare and answerable in law.
3…Children are human beings. Stop treating them as Commodities like a
business deal. Cost only criteria and can ruin children’s lives
4.....If adopted, where appropriate, child contact maintained with birth family in
line with article 8 of the UN Convention on the rights of the child. (Should only
be stopped in the worst case scenario)
5 ...Kinship care before strangers to be the first choice.
6. ..All below accountable to law. (a)--..False accusations. (b)-..Erroneous reporting by social workers.
(c)…Flouting of court orders (d) Social Services Orchestrating “cover up’s”,
when children are failed
7…Proper recording of all social work meetings and discussions E.g. Dual tape
recording similar to police proceedings (to prevent and combat section 6 b+d)
8….More “transparency” and especially “accountability” for Social work and their
managers
9….Specialised training for social workers in the best interests of children. (Only
the most highly experienced social workers to deal in child protection)
10…. Accusations removed from record, when not proven.
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent , Glasgow G52 1PJ, 0141 882 5658. http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk
(Dealing with Conflict, protecting children)
Separation and divorce can be a nasty and bitter experience for every one concerned especially the children. It appears to be that 90% are fathers that lose out but it can happen to mothers too.. You would not believe your new loving sweetheart, presently telling you that “I will always be yours”, could be anything else but loving and gentle.
In our experience in dealing with grandparents that are prevented from contact with their grandchildren is that there is at least one parent involved too. We have come to the conclusion that both are inseparable and in the end it is the children we feel for in the conflict of hatred, spite and revenge that ruins their lives.
We just hope you will not experience any of these horrors but! Some of you certainly will.
Too often we have heard “I just can’t believe it, that she/he could go to these extremes like telling lies about domestic violence and using the children for revenge and blackmail to get back at me for their own selfish means”.
If you are experiencing marital problems or thinking of separating get in touch with a family group for advice. Do not delay and do not try to work it out yourself or force your will on anyone. Contact any of us listed on the contacts list before you do anything, and we mean anything. If we can’t help we will know a man that can.
1. Urgent! Firstly contact an outside family agency, someone not involved with the family and keep contact throughout. You must resolve the situation without any aggression or incidents or you will lose. If you don’t heed this you will possibly lose your children as well.
2. Speak to someone in a help group before contacting anyone you are in conflict with.. You will be too emotional to handle this on your own.
3. Do not swear or raise your voice or obstruct in any way. if you do come in contact with your ex-partner or their family.
4. If the police become involved move away as directed immediately. The police have no stomach for family problems. Do not argue or try to reason as you will get removed and possibly charged with breach or harassment and it will never be removed from your record, even if you are innocent. It could be used against you if courts or Social Services get involved. Don’t give any excuse or you will be indefensible and not even we can help. You have been warned!
5. You will have to fight for any rights you do have regarding your children. It is equal on paper but don’t be fooled by this, in reality if you don’t live with your children, in the eyes of Social services, schools and the police you have no rights at all. Always have witnesses to everything you do and record everything in a diary.
6. If you need a solicitor make sure they are family law specialists as others could possibly take your case and lack the expertise. Be prepared to do most of the case work yourself, they are your children, make sure you get things right, you will only get one chance.
7. Mediation has resolved many disputes before a molehill becomes a mountain, before it goes into the real slanging match with accusing and condemning in court. You don’t want to be the cause of them saying, “you are angry and aggressive so I won’t attend mediation”. Give no excuses to refuse to attend. Make sure that the mediation is provided by an independent organisation like Family Mediation. They ask for donations only. You will find them in your local phone book or computer.
8. There also appears to be a standard template used by the parent with residency so do not be alarmed to find yourself falsely accused and branded as:-
a) Violent b)Controlling c)Abusive d)Aggressive c) Sexually abuse.
All of these will be used to alienate you from your children.
9. Above all try and gain agreement through mediation without involvement of lawyers, courts, police or Social Services. If you gain a court order for contact it is not always complied with and is often not enforced making a mockery of our family laws. Your children have nothing to gain by these agencies involvement and very real significant harm can come of it.
10. Seek help as soon you can from a help group and keep in touch with at least one of their members or/and their meetings.
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Jimmy - 0141 882 5658 - UK
Jim - 01389 874 095- Clydebank and the west
Charlie - 01324 410 064- Larbet
Bill - 01563 821 869- Ayrshire
Richard - 01224 297 175- Aberdeen & the north
Eamonn - 0141 580 0102- Barrhead & the west
Frank- 01492 874 395- Wales
Elton - 01253 341 659- Blackpool area.
The Ten Commandments of Family Law.
(What we feel needs to change for our children’s best interest?)
1…Our motto is “Bringing Families Together” so we think the best interests of a
child starts with Equal parenting when there is no factually proven reason not
to.
2....The ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ to be Mandatory for Professionals working in
Children’s welfare and answerable in law.
3…Children are human beings. Stop treating them as Commodities like a
business deal. Cost only criteria and can ruin children’s lives
4.....If adopted, where appropriate, child contact maintained with birth family in
line with article 8 of the UN Convention on the rights of the child. (Should only
be stopped in the worst case scenario)
5 ...Kinship care before strangers to be the first choice.
6. ..All below accountable to law. (a)--..False accusations. (b)-..Erroneous reporting by social workers.
(c)…Flouting of court orders (d) Social Services Orchestrating “cover up’s”,
when children are failed
7…Proper recording of all social work meetings and discussions E.g. Dual tape
recording similar to police proceedings (to prevent and combat section 6 b+d)
8….More “transparency” and especially “accountability” for Social work and their
managers
9….Specialised training for social workers in the best interests of children. (Only
the most highly experienced social workers to deal in child protection)
10…. Accusations removed from record, when not proven.
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent , Glasgow G52 1PJ, 0141 882 5658. http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk
Tuesday, May 19, 2009
Public Communications Unit
Thank you for your emails dated 1 April about child contact. I am sure you will appreciate the Ministers receive a vast amount of correspondence and are unable to reply to each one personally. Your emails have been forwarded to the Department for Children, Schools and Families as this department is responsible for children's services. I have been asked to reply to issues that fall within the remit of this department. The Government believes that children benefit from a continuing relationship with both parents following divorce or separation, where it is safe and in the child’s best interests. The Children Act 1989 supports this and, most importantly, it makes the welfare of the child concerned, rather than the rights of the parents, its paramount consideration. While most parents can and do resolve issues about contact and residence following separation or divorce, the court becomes involved if either parent applies for an order for residence or contact. The court has a wide discretion to take account of all the facts and circumstances of each individual case. Decisions are made after the judge has heard and considered all the evidence provided by both parties and any other witnesses, including experts. Both parties are entitled to have their views heard and have the opportunity to respond to any evidence put before the court. If arrangements under a court order do not work out, either parent may, according to the circumstances, apply to the court for the order to be varied, revoked, or enforced. We do not see any need to change this law, but we do need to change the way parents settle disputes. In particular, we would like to see a reduction in the number of parents resorting to the courts, as this so often results in poorer outcomes for the children and greater dissatisfaction for the parents. Where cases do come before the court, we are promoting extensive use of measures such as mediation and in-court conciliation to divert such cases from a full court hearing. Linked to this, we also want to provide a wider range of levers to ensure the proper implementation of court orders. It is realised that there are cases where non-resident parents have difficulty in maintaining contact with their children because of the obstructive behaviour of the parent with whom the children reside. Where contact has been agreed or ordered by the courts, it is essential that it is adhered to. If, at the end of a long and difficult dispute, the contact ordered by the court does not take place, then it has been a waste of time and energy but, more importantly, the child is not benefiting from what the court has decided will promote their welfare. The enforcement of contact orders is a sensitive area. Deliberate refusal to obey any court order is contempt of court that can be punished with a fine or imprisonment. The court also has the power to decide to transfer residence to the other (non-resident) parent if this is considered to be in the child’s best interests. However, penalties such as fines and imprisonment may not always be appropriate in a child contact case because of the effect that this may have on the children at the centre of the dispute. The Children and Adoption Act 2006 gives courts additional powers to facilitate contact and enforce contact orders. For instance, in addition to the current system of fines and imprisonment, they will be able to refer parents to a counsellor or a parenting programme or make enforcement orders imposing requirements for unpaid work. The courts will also be able to award financial compensation, for example where the cost of a holiday has been lost. These additional levers will be available to the courts in any contact case, if the court considers they would assist resolution. The Government does not believe that an automatic 50:50 division of the child’s time between the two parents would be in the best interests of most children. In many separated families, such arrangements would not work in practical terms, owing to living arrangements or work commitments. Enforcing this type of arrangement would not be what many children want and could have a damaging impact on some of them. Children are not a commodity to be apportioned equally after separation. The best arrangements for them will depend on a variety of issues particular to their circumstances: a one-size-fits-all formula will not work. The assumption that both parents have equal status and value as parents is enshrined in current law. The actual arrangements made by the courts start from that position. Mediation can offer advantages in relation to family disputes in some cases although none of the major family mediation providers in England and Wales believe that it is possible to make family mediation compulsory. The court may adjourn a case for people to consider the benefits of mediation, but it has no power to compel people to take this route. Although the number of cases referred to family mediation is growing, it is not suitable for all family disputes. It is not normally appropriate to attempt to use family mediation in cases where there has been domestic violence. Regarding your concerns about the court system, I have forwarded your correspondence to the Ministry of Justice. They will reply to you directly concerning these issues. Yours sincerely Anita Dixon Public Communications Unit
Sunday, May 10, 2009
AGM Report and Newslatter
Grandparents Apart UK
A.G.M. Report. Newsletter.
Dear Friends/members,
This year our AGM is on Tuesday 2nd June 2009 7pm 8.30pm at The Pearce Institute Govan Cross Govan Glasgow G51.
Our main concern today is, the membership is not being renewed and at the rate it is falling it will be a question of just how much we can do to further our cause. A lot of enquirers who have and still receive help and support do not pay membership fees. This is unfair and limits what we can do. If you want us to keep campaigning (See what we have achieved) you must contribute your fees. Because of this we had to increase the fee to £10.00p with our free book ‘Grandparents Speak out for Vulnerable Children’ for every membership renewed this year. As you will know we are all volunteer workers and don’t have the staff to cover everything. So we ask that you check your membership card and then please act accordingly
It cost a fortune to get 600 odd letters to our contacts (all we could afford in stamps) and 4000 in emails out for people to send in to their MSPs the request for them to raise the question in parliament for ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ to be made mandatory.
The Mobile Information Centre we did with the Big Lottery grant is finished. Margaret and I did our best but with no real help we had to return around £3000.00p We covered as much of Scotland (The grant was only for Scotland) as we could and I think we done very well. The Charter for Grandchildren and Parenting Agreement is far more widely known now than ever it was.
‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ being made mandatory for all professionals of all UK countries who work in the welfare of children has become our war cry and we need to keep writing to our respective members of parliament to make it happen. There is no valid reason for not making it mandatory as a government created it (with our help) and not to do this is leaving gaps and is not in the best interests of children.
We have created a Petition (enclosed) for Scotland, England, Wales and Northern Ireland said they work on the English one. Please help to get as many signatures as possible filled in and return it to us before the 6th July 2009 to Grandparents Apart UK 22 Alness Crescent Glasgow G52 1PJ. Also we need your story for evidence to present to the petitions committee to back our claims. We have a few but we need more. And it needs to be very quickly. We need to know how grandparents have been ignored by professionals regarding their grandchildren. If you phone us and tell us how it happened to you. It will be treated in the strictest confidence by us and the government.
The demonstrations in Glasgow and Dundee went really well in getting tremendous coverage from local TV, Radio and newspapers. One of our members is planning to hold a demo in Aberdeen. It would appear demos are the best way to bring our cause to the media’s notice. Nationally Jimmy and Margaret appeared on GMTV in London and their story has appeared in several papers of the national press. Jimmy done a 30 minute BBC interview with the well known. Radio Scotland Battle Lines Interviewer. Shareen Nanjiani
GRANDPARENTS APART INTERVIEW PART 1,2 ,3.http://www.youtube.com/v/o7YBPu3QurY http://www.youtube.com/v/UFkj5LJX8CE http://www.youtube.com/v/QqvpRdl6Q4s
I have enclosed a letter for you to send to your respective member of parliament for them to adopt ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ as mandatory for professionals. Please send it to them if you have not done so already.
N.B. It is not us that gets the job done. It is you the constituent by your support and putting pressure on your Members of Parliaments.
Jimmy Deuchars (manager)
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ
0141 882 5658
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Grandparents Apart UK.
Petition.
Grandparents Apart UK request the petitions committee to urge the government to make ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ mandatory for professionals who work in the welfare of children.
More info:- http://grandparentsapartuk.blogspot.com/
Name Address Tel; Signature
http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/TCFGRA/
‘The Charter for Grandchildren’
It is important that parents, grandparents and other family members, speak to, and treat each other, with respect. You may not get on, but you can still be civil, for the sake of the children. Try to avoid arguing with or criticising family members in front of the children. It can be very upsetting for them.
On occasions professional organizations such as social work departments or the courts can become involved and may have to make decisions that will have a lasting impact throughout a child’s entire life. In these circumstances it is vital that the loving and supportive role that the wider family, in particular grandparents can play is respected and protected for the child…
FAMILIES ARE IMPORTANT TO CHILDREN
Grandchildren can expect:
To be involved with and helped to understand decisions made about their lives.
To be treated fairly
To know and maintain contact with their family (except in very exceptional circumstances) and other people who are important to them.
To know that their grandparents still love them, even if they are not able to see them at the present time.
To know their family history.
The adults in their lives to put their needs first and to protect them from disputes between adults - not to use them as weapons in quarrels between adults.
Social workers , when making assessments about their lives, to take into account the loving and supporting role grandparents can play in their lives.
The Courts, when making decisions about their lives, to take into account the loving and supporting role grandparents can play in their lives.
Lawyers and other advisers to encourage relationship counseling or mediation when adults seek advice on matters affecting them and their children.
Along with others, Grandparents Apart UK put a lot of hard work into “The Charter for Grandchildren” by demanding to be heard about the gaps in family law concerning their grandchildren. Why? Because we really do have the best interests of our grandchildren at heart, if it was not for our love of them why would we bother?
.............................................................................................................................................................
We are happy to promote the Charter for Grandchildren and the Parenting Agreement because they are in the best interests of children if they are used right.
letter to your member of Parliament.
Dear ……………………..,………………………
The Scottish Parliament or The House of Commons or Welsh Assembly GovernmentEdinburgh London. Cathays Park EH99 1SP SW1A 0AA Cardiff CF10 3NQ ...
I have contacted Grandparents Apart UK for support regarding losing contact with our grandchildren. With their nine years experiences and what has happened to me I feel justified in supporting this proposal and would be obliged if you would make it an issue in parliament. I believe A Government created this Charter and therefore they should ensure its effectiveness.
The Proposal:- We therefore propose that ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ ‘ The role grandparent can play in their grandchildren’s lives’ be made Mandatory for Professionals dealing with children thereby ensuring in the absence of one or both parents that the love and protective role grandparents can play is not wasted as is the case at present because grandparents are regarded as irrelevant persons and therefore rarely considered in practice.…Being mandatory for professionals would not be an imposition on the parents or family in general…If the governments were to adopt this as an example it would send a message of encouragement to families that grandparents can be a huge asset in the family and it could be worthwhile attending mediation focusing on the best interests of the children.
Failure to implement this is criminal and neglect in providing all the possible protection for children in need and in many ways is actually encouraging child abuse I understand this statement will not be discussed or shown to anyone outside the theatre of government and will be completely confidential. I look forward to your reply.
Name…………………………………………..Address……………………………………….
Town…………………………………………..Post code…………………………………….
Phone number………………………………
E-mail…………………………………………(If you have one)
Signature……………………………………….
Grandparents Apart UK. 22 Alness Crescent, Glasgow G52 1PJ
A Scottish Registered Volunteer Charity No. SC 031558
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
There is a huge rise in drug and alcohol abuse and there is reckoned to be a million children in Britain today living in a home with one or both parents addicted to drugs or alcohol and fear of the ever increasing cases of child abuse from different partners in a child’s life
Our new proposal is considering the child in as much as not to have the protection of their
Grandparents in child abuse cases are criminal neglect by the authorities and not in their best interests. Every means of protection should be used. It is generally agreed by governments and most organisations dealing with children that grandparents are important in the family.. It is also agreed that they can be vital in the early detection of child abuse and in the care and stability of children when they are in a crisis situation especially in the middle of the night. That is if they are informed about it at all being irrelevant persons. If the crisis has been violent and very upsetting it would be in the best interests of the children to be settled as quickly as possible with someone who cares for them. What we find overall that needs to change for our children’s best interest? 1…Our motto is “Bringing Families Together” so we think the best interests of a child starts with
Equal parenting when there is no factually proven reason not to.
2....‘Charter for Grandchildren’ to be Mandatory for Professionals working in Children’s welfare.
3…Children are human beings. Stop treating them as commodities like a business deal
4.....If adopted, where appropriate, child contact maintained with birth family in line with article 8 of the un convention on the rights of the child. (should only be stopped in the worst case scenario)
5 ...Kinship care before strangers to be the first choice.
6. …All below accountable to law. (a)--..False accusations. (b)-..Erroneous reporting by social workers. (c)…Flouting of court orders (d) Social Service Orchestrating “cover up’s”, when children are Failed
7… Proper recording of all social work meetings and discussions E.g. Dual tape recording similar to police proceedings (to prevent and combat section 6 b+d)
8….More “transparency” and especially “accountability” for Social work and their managers
9….Specialised training for social workers in the best interests of children. (Only the most highly experienced social workers to deal in child protection) 10….Accusations removed from record, when not proven.
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ
0141 882 5658
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Grandparents Apart UK 2009
What we and you have achieved.
We have had a great write up in the Daily Mail, the same week we appeared on GMTV full VIP treatment. Also a radio interview on Radio 2 with Jeremy Vine. Now we are doing a Christmas show with The Sunny Govan Community Radio 103.5 FM which is fun.
Previously we have had a documentary made about us by Grampian TV and The Scottish Politics Show been on BBC radio Newcastle Radio Scotland, STV and BBC news bulletins. We must try and keep this publicity going if you want the law changed.
Please ask at your Scottish Libraries, Social works, community centres, doctor’s surgeries if they have ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ or ‘The parenting Agreement’ in fact anywhere concerning families the more we ask the more popular they will get.
In our relatively short period of existence, because we have lobbied Westminster and the Scottish Parliament and produced constant press releases through television and radio and of course with your membership and donations we have -
1. Dispelled the myth that grandparents have a right of contact with their grandchildren. Now that the problem has been identified and accepted we have attempted to raise the profile of grandparents all over the UK and show the benefits and protection they can offer grandchildren.
2. Provided a helpline service for grandparents that was not available before in Scotland. And is proving to be very successful in England too. We are very proud of our helpline‘A listening ear’ for devastated grandparents, which we know has comforted some grannies that were suicidal
3. Worked in a Stakeholder Group with the Scottish Government as a result the ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ and the ‘Parenting Agreement’ were created to help families and children in particular.
4. Shown that ‘Bridge building’ is our speciality. The more grandparents that is aware of our existence the more we can fulfil our motto of ‘Bringing Families Together’
5. Became tired waiting for further improvements, we decided to take the matter into our
own hands and proposed to open an independent Family Information and Education Centre so we asked for a £½ million Big Lottery Grant but were knocked back, instead we were awarded £10, 000,00p to develop our idea as a Mobile Family Information and Education Centre and toured Scotland promoting the Charter for Grandchildren and The Parenting Agreement. See;- http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
6. highlighted the unfairness of our legal aid system and it has now been announced that new proposals from the legal aid board and the Scottish Government are to change the way solicitors are to be paid for legal aid work.
7. Risen from being seen as a complainer to the Government to being a respected source of information to allow them to gather information about families, being invited to meetings and our opinions sought.
8. Recently we have got Children 1st (NSPCC) agreeing with us on 3 points.
a) They are urging the government to give grandparents the right of information on their grandchildren's welfare.
b) That the Charter for Grandchildren and Parenting Agreement must be publicised more.
c) Family Information Centres should be available throughout the country. And for children's protection in drug and alcohol homes.
9. Adam Ingram MSP Minister for Children invited us to a meeting in June to hear our views on kinship care as we have been campaigning hard for this. On 4th December 2007 the Scottish Government announced they would be paying the granny grant of £119 to £199 to kinship granny carers. Details from our website http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
10. This year 2008 our group has been invited once more to work with the Scottish Government on 'Making Contact Work'. Our first meeting was very encouraging and we did get across that the administration of family law have become blasé in the best interests of the child and need to be tightened up and monitored.
11. Due to a demo we arranged at the Scottish Parliament in February this year. Last month September 2008 Nigel Don MSP with the backing of 22 other MSPs arranged a debate in the Scottish Parliament on injustices in family law. The Scottish Justice Minister accepted that there are injustices. A huge step in the right direction. Our policy is to ask everyone who contacts us to also contact their MSP and keep on at them as it is you the constituent contacting them that changes will be made. - --
12. Scottish Woman's Aid:-
(Quote)"! totally agree that grandparents are often best placed to detect any kind of abuse or addiction that harms children and are often left picking up the pieces with no support when things fall apart. I think resolving that bit should be a priority (i.e. offering financial and emotional support) and then perhaps there's scope to move on to greater recognition of the role grandparents play and how this could be established in law".
13, Demonstration.
Our group organised a demonstration on 4th March 2009 in George Square, Glasgow City Centre Which attracted very good media attention from The Daily Mail, Sunday Express, Sunday Herald, Scottish GMTV, The Scotsman, Sunny Govan Radio Station, STV news, A BBC ½ hour program. due to be broadcasted on Radio Scotland Battle lines at 11.30, 27th March 2009. This demo was calling for ‘The Charter for Grandparents’ to be made mandatory for professionals that work with the welfare of children and family to ensure children can have the best that grandparents can offer without treading on the toes of parents. To ignore this call is not in the best interests of children
14 Our campaign on 25th march 2009 in Dundee went very well. We were right outside the room where the directors were having registration and their morning coffee breaks and they could not help but see us as we for. waved to them. Someone heard them debating us being there so we have achieved what we came
Alan Baird the boss man in question has refused to resign over the Branden Muir case in Dundee and would not answer our phone calls to his office. His secretary refused to give us any information as to his whereabouts and even refused to speak to the media.
The media coverage was Brilliant, GMTV, STV, Radio Times, The Telegraph, The Courier and a few radio and newspaper reporters which i can't remember them all but will be posted on the blog above as they become available. We can't thank them all enough for their coverage and kindness.
A.G.M. Report. Newsletter.
Dear Friends/members,
This year our AGM is on Tuesday 2nd June 2009 7pm 8.30pm at The Pearce Institute Govan Cross Govan Glasgow G51.
Our main concern today is, the membership is not being renewed and at the rate it is falling it will be a question of just how much we can do to further our cause. A lot of enquirers who have and still receive help and support do not pay membership fees. This is unfair and limits what we can do. If you want us to keep campaigning (See what we have achieved) you must contribute your fees. Because of this we had to increase the fee to £10.00p with our free book ‘Grandparents Speak out for Vulnerable Children’ for every membership renewed this year. As you will know we are all volunteer workers and don’t have the staff to cover everything. So we ask that you check your membership card and then please act accordingly
It cost a fortune to get 600 odd letters to our contacts (all we could afford in stamps) and 4000 in emails out for people to send in to their MSPs the request for them to raise the question in parliament for ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ to be made mandatory.
The Mobile Information Centre we did with the Big Lottery grant is finished. Margaret and I did our best but with no real help we had to return around £3000.00p We covered as much of Scotland (The grant was only for Scotland) as we could and I think we done very well. The Charter for Grandchildren and Parenting Agreement is far more widely known now than ever it was.
‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ being made mandatory for all professionals of all UK countries who work in the welfare of children has become our war cry and we need to keep writing to our respective members of parliament to make it happen. There is no valid reason for not making it mandatory as a government created it (with our help) and not to do this is leaving gaps and is not in the best interests of children.
We have created a Petition (enclosed) for Scotland, England, Wales and Northern Ireland said they work on the English one. Please help to get as many signatures as possible filled in and return it to us before the 6th July 2009 to Grandparents Apart UK 22 Alness Crescent Glasgow G52 1PJ. Also we need your story for evidence to present to the petitions committee to back our claims. We have a few but we need more. And it needs to be very quickly. We need to know how grandparents have been ignored by professionals regarding their grandchildren. If you phone us and tell us how it happened to you. It will be treated in the strictest confidence by us and the government.
The demonstrations in Glasgow and Dundee went really well in getting tremendous coverage from local TV, Radio and newspapers. One of our members is planning to hold a demo in Aberdeen. It would appear demos are the best way to bring our cause to the media’s notice. Nationally Jimmy and Margaret appeared on GMTV in London and their story has appeared in several papers of the national press. Jimmy done a 30 minute BBC interview with the well known. Radio Scotland Battle Lines Interviewer. Shareen Nanjiani
GRANDPARENTS APART INTERVIEW PART 1,2 ,3.http://www.youtube.com/v/o7YBPu3QurY http://www.youtube.com/v/UFkj5LJX8CE http://www.youtube.com/v/QqvpRdl6Q4s
I have enclosed a letter for you to send to your respective member of parliament for them to adopt ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ as mandatory for professionals. Please send it to them if you have not done so already.
N.B. It is not us that gets the job done. It is you the constituent by your support and putting pressure on your Members of Parliaments.
Jimmy Deuchars (manager)
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ
0141 882 5658
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Grandparents Apart UK.
Petition.
Grandparents Apart UK request the petitions committee to urge the government to make ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ mandatory for professionals who work in the welfare of children.
More info:- http://grandparentsapartuk.blogspot.com/
Name Address Tel; Signature
http://petitions.number10.gov.uk/TCFGRA/
‘The Charter for Grandchildren’
It is important that parents, grandparents and other family members, speak to, and treat each other, with respect. You may not get on, but you can still be civil, for the sake of the children. Try to avoid arguing with or criticising family members in front of the children. It can be very upsetting for them.
On occasions professional organizations such as social work departments or the courts can become involved and may have to make decisions that will have a lasting impact throughout a child’s entire life. In these circumstances it is vital that the loving and supportive role that the wider family, in particular grandparents can play is respected and protected for the child…
FAMILIES ARE IMPORTANT TO CHILDREN
Grandchildren can expect:
To be involved with and helped to understand decisions made about their lives.
To be treated fairly
To know and maintain contact with their family (except in very exceptional circumstances) and other people who are important to them.
To know that their grandparents still love them, even if they are not able to see them at the present time.
To know their family history.
The adults in their lives to put their needs first and to protect them from disputes between adults - not to use them as weapons in quarrels between adults.
Social workers , when making assessments about their lives, to take into account the loving and supporting role grandparents can play in their lives.
The Courts, when making decisions about their lives, to take into account the loving and supporting role grandparents can play in their lives.
Lawyers and other advisers to encourage relationship counseling or mediation when adults seek advice on matters affecting them and their children.
Along with others, Grandparents Apart UK put a lot of hard work into “The Charter for Grandchildren” by demanding to be heard about the gaps in family law concerning their grandchildren. Why? Because we really do have the best interests of our grandchildren at heart, if it was not for our love of them why would we bother?
.............................................................................................................................................................
We are happy to promote the Charter for Grandchildren and the Parenting Agreement because they are in the best interests of children if they are used right.
letter to your member of Parliament.
Dear ……………………..,………………………
The Scottish Parliament or The House of Commons or Welsh Assembly GovernmentEdinburgh London. Cathays Park EH99 1SP SW1A 0AA Cardiff CF10 3NQ ...
I have contacted Grandparents Apart UK for support regarding losing contact with our grandchildren. With their nine years experiences and what has happened to me I feel justified in supporting this proposal and would be obliged if you would make it an issue in parliament. I believe A Government created this Charter and therefore they should ensure its effectiveness.
The Proposal:- We therefore propose that ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ ‘ The role grandparent can play in their grandchildren’s lives’ be made Mandatory for Professionals dealing with children thereby ensuring in the absence of one or both parents that the love and protective role grandparents can play is not wasted as is the case at present because grandparents are regarded as irrelevant persons and therefore rarely considered in practice.…Being mandatory for professionals would not be an imposition on the parents or family in general…If the governments were to adopt this as an example it would send a message of encouragement to families that grandparents can be a huge asset in the family and it could be worthwhile attending mediation focusing on the best interests of the children.
Failure to implement this is criminal and neglect in providing all the possible protection for children in need and in many ways is actually encouraging child abuse I understand this statement will not be discussed or shown to anyone outside the theatre of government and will be completely confidential. I look forward to your reply.
Name…………………………………………..Address……………………………………….
Town…………………………………………..Post code…………………………………….
Phone number………………………………
E-mail…………………………………………(If you have one)
Signature……………………………………….
Grandparents Apart UK. 22 Alness Crescent, Glasgow G52 1PJ
A Scottish Registered Volunteer Charity No. SC 031558
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
There is a huge rise in drug and alcohol abuse and there is reckoned to be a million children in Britain today living in a home with one or both parents addicted to drugs or alcohol and fear of the ever increasing cases of child abuse from different partners in a child’s life
Our new proposal is considering the child in as much as not to have the protection of their
Grandparents in child abuse cases are criminal neglect by the authorities and not in their best interests. Every means of protection should be used. It is generally agreed by governments and most organisations dealing with children that grandparents are important in the family.. It is also agreed that they can be vital in the early detection of child abuse and in the care and stability of children when they are in a crisis situation especially in the middle of the night. That is if they are informed about it at all being irrelevant persons. If the crisis has been violent and very upsetting it would be in the best interests of the children to be settled as quickly as possible with someone who cares for them. What we find overall that needs to change for our children’s best interest? 1…Our motto is “Bringing Families Together” so we think the best interests of a child starts with
Equal parenting when there is no factually proven reason not to.
2....‘Charter for Grandchildren’ to be Mandatory for Professionals working in Children’s welfare.
3…Children are human beings. Stop treating them as commodities like a business deal
4.....If adopted, where appropriate, child contact maintained with birth family in line with article 8 of the un convention on the rights of the child. (should only be stopped in the worst case scenario)
5 ...Kinship care before strangers to be the first choice.
6. …All below accountable to law. (a)--..False accusations. (b)-..Erroneous reporting by social workers. (c)…Flouting of court orders (d) Social Service Orchestrating “cover up’s”, when children are Failed
7… Proper recording of all social work meetings and discussions E.g. Dual tape recording similar to police proceedings (to prevent and combat section 6 b+d)
8….More “transparency” and especially “accountability” for Social work and their managers
9….Specialised training for social workers in the best interests of children. (Only the most highly experienced social workers to deal in child protection) 10….Accusations removed from record, when not proven.
Jimmy Deuchars
Grandparents Apart UK
22 Alness crescent
Glasgow G52 1PJ
0141 882 5658
http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
Grandparents Apart UK 2009
What we and you have achieved.
We have had a great write up in the Daily Mail, the same week we appeared on GMTV full VIP treatment. Also a radio interview on Radio 2 with Jeremy Vine. Now we are doing a Christmas show with The Sunny Govan Community Radio 103.5 FM which is fun.
Previously we have had a documentary made about us by Grampian TV and The Scottish Politics Show been on BBC radio Newcastle Radio Scotland, STV and BBC news bulletins. We must try and keep this publicity going if you want the law changed.
Please ask at your Scottish Libraries, Social works, community centres, doctor’s surgeries if they have ‘The Charter for Grandchildren’ or ‘The parenting Agreement’ in fact anywhere concerning families the more we ask the more popular they will get.
In our relatively short period of existence, because we have lobbied Westminster and the Scottish Parliament and produced constant press releases through television and radio and of course with your membership and donations we have -
1. Dispelled the myth that grandparents have a right of contact with their grandchildren. Now that the problem has been identified and accepted we have attempted to raise the profile of grandparents all over the UK and show the benefits and protection they can offer grandchildren.
2. Provided a helpline service for grandparents that was not available before in Scotland. And is proving to be very successful in England too. We are very proud of our helpline‘A listening ear’ for devastated grandparents, which we know has comforted some grannies that were suicidal
3. Worked in a Stakeholder Group with the Scottish Government as a result the ‘Charter for Grandchildren’ and the ‘Parenting Agreement’ were created to help families and children in particular.
4. Shown that ‘Bridge building’ is our speciality. The more grandparents that is aware of our existence the more we can fulfil our motto of ‘Bringing Families Together’
5. Became tired waiting for further improvements, we decided to take the matter into our
own hands and proposed to open an independent Family Information and Education Centre so we asked for a £½ million Big Lottery Grant but were knocked back, instead we were awarded £10, 000,00p to develop our idea as a Mobile Family Information and Education Centre and toured Scotland promoting the Charter for Grandchildren and The Parenting Agreement. See;- http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
6. highlighted the unfairness of our legal aid system and it has now been announced that new proposals from the legal aid board and the Scottish Government are to change the way solicitors are to be paid for legal aid work.
7. Risen from being seen as a complainer to the Government to being a respected source of information to allow them to gather information about families, being invited to meetings and our opinions sought.
8. Recently we have got Children 1st (NSPCC) agreeing with us on 3 points.
a) They are urging the government to give grandparents the right of information on their grandchildren's welfare.
b) That the Charter for Grandchildren and Parenting Agreement must be publicised more.
c) Family Information Centres should be available throughout the country. And for children's protection in drug and alcohol homes.
9. Adam Ingram MSP Minister for Children invited us to a meeting in June to hear our views on kinship care as we have been campaigning hard for this. On 4th December 2007 the Scottish Government announced they would be paying the granny grant of £119 to £199 to kinship granny carers. Details from our website http://www.grandparentsapart.co.uk/
10. This year 2008 our group has been invited once more to work with the Scottish Government on 'Making Contact Work'. Our first meeting was very encouraging and we did get across that the administration of family law have become blasé in the best interests of the child and need to be tightened up and monitored.
11. Due to a demo we arranged at the Scottish Parliament in February this year. Last month September 2008 Nigel Don MSP with the backing of 22 other MSPs arranged a debate in the Scottish Parliament on injustices in family law. The Scottish Justice Minister accepted that there are injustices. A huge step in the right direction. Our policy is to ask everyone who contacts us to also contact their MSP and keep on at them as it is you the constituent contacting them that changes will be made. - --
12. Scottish Woman's Aid:-
(Quote)"! totally agree that grandparents are often best placed to detect any kind of abuse or addiction that harms children and are often left picking up the pieces with no support when things fall apart. I think resolving that bit should be a priority (i.e. offering financial and emotional support) and then perhaps there's scope to move on to greater recognition of the role grandparents play and how this could be established in law".
13, Demonstration.
Our group organised a demonstration on 4th March 2009 in George Square, Glasgow City Centre Which attracted very good media attention from The Daily Mail, Sunday Express, Sunday Herald, Scottish GMTV, The Scotsman, Sunny Govan Radio Station, STV news, A BBC ½ hour program. due to be broadcasted on Radio Scotland Battle lines at 11.30, 27th March 2009. This demo was calling for ‘The Charter for Grandparents’ to be made mandatory for professionals that work with the welfare of children and family to ensure children can have the best that grandparents can offer without treading on the toes of parents. To ignore this call is not in the best interests of children
14 Our campaign on 25th march 2009 in Dundee went very well. We were right outside the room where the directors were having registration and their morning coffee breaks and they could not help but see us as we for. waved to them. Someone heard them debating us being there so we have achieved what we came
Alan Baird the boss man in question has refused to resign over the Branden Muir case in Dundee and would not answer our phone calls to his office. His secretary refused to give us any information as to his whereabouts and even refused to speak to the media.
The media coverage was Brilliant, GMTV, STV, Radio Times, The Telegraph, The Courier and a few radio and newspaper reporters which i can't remember them all but will be posted on the blog above as they become available. We can't thank them all enough for their coverage and kindness.
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